Enjoy the Process

Good morning!

This morning, as I work through my morning writing, my three wildlings have each come in for attention, cuddles, and to try their best to instigate playtime. The first to interrupt, Afina hopped up and sat on my journal and meowed to be picked up and cuddled. I obliged, enjoying the nuzzles and purs, and noted that Miss Fancy Pants is becoming more vocal by the day.

Teddy appeared after Miss Fancy Pants hopped down with his gentle little foot taps on my shin. He is known to be persistent about being picked up by springing hop jumps, so he is paw tapping your knee. His favorite is being tucked into my robe, seated upright, with his head poking out, watching me work.

Baby Dog is in play hound mode. He gently places his Green Bean on my table and tap dances backwards, beguiling you with his eyes to engage in his antics. His beseeching look meets your gaze, then looks back and forth until you cave and are enticed into play. Once you reach for the coveted toy, he braces in anticipation for the throw and his favorite, the victory laps.

This is a classic example of most of my morning as I work through my routine. I would not change a second of it. I love each one dearly and cherish their joy and antics. So, the short and sweet of it today is a gentle reminder to slow down and enjoy the process, interruptions and all.

~Missy

Semester Break

As my semester break comes to a close, I am wondering where all that precious time off went. Christmas and New Year's Eve took a good chunk of time, and the festivities are always worth it. The end of the year holidays bring friends and family from afar, many of whom we do not see nearly enough throughout the year.

We have a traditional family Christmas with family traveling in from out of state. There is the traditional Christmas dinner and gift opening to close out the day's festivities. Everyone is in a lovely food coma as the kiddos and fur children eagerly unwrap their presents.

Our New Year’s Eve began with a revisit to the spot where we had our second date. A lovely hot spring that has a lodge and guest rooms. The lodge hosts live music and a New Year's Eve dinner after a heavenly soak in the warm waters, with dancing. We spent the first two years as a solo date and began inviting family and friends to join us in ringing in the New Year.

So while the time flew by for my semester break, the fun and festivities were worth it. I also managed to get some important things checked off my to-do list. What I did not complete has now been moved to my working list for the upcoming semester. What would be lovely is to add the additional things I did get done that weren't on my list to the done list. There is satisfaction in checking things off your list, so why not add the big and the little to a completed list so you can see them for that moment? A version of your own adult gold star for the day.

The short and sweet is to remember to enjoy your time, check off what you got done, be excited about the unplanned accomplishments, and start a new list! Smile and move forward, it is your race and yours alone!

~Missy

Week One of 2026

Today marks the first week of 2026 as officially being over. How was that first week for you? Did you have a New Year’s resolution you began? How has your follow-through on the commitment you made been?

Sometimes it is difficult to make a change in our lives, even if it is planned. Our patterns of behavior are ingrained. We follow routines we did not even realize we had on autonomic function. So, when we decide to make a change, it is a focused effort to follow through.

I have found it helps when you talk with someone, a friend or a professional on the matter. If you want to start working out, create a buddy system, someone who goes with you. Go to a gym with personal trainers or classes you can sign up for. That little extra bit of accountability to someone or something else is enough to keep you going until the new habit becomes an ingrained part of your routine. Look for the benefits and positive side effects you are gaining from your change. Document them with pictures or write them down. Create a vision board! Something you can set goals and gauge your progress on. Be proud of the work you are putting into yourself.

Always make it fun! Fun equals more happiness and joy in your life. Increased positivity and all the good hormones you can get naturally! That is the short and sweet of it!

~Missy

How do you focus on being positive and adding positivity to your day?

A little trick is to train yourself to focus on the positivity in every situation. What lesson can you learn from the good and the bad? Practice self-reflection and think about what you are thinking (metacognition). You are the only thing you can control. Your thoughts, emotions, and actions, that's it.

Yep, it is hard in a world inundated with social media platforms, electronic devices, and the expectation of instant gratification. Sadly, these forums have exacerbated and created keyboard warriors, increased bullying, and caused an explosion in mobbing. So, focus on controlling how you perceive the outside world. Let your actions demonstrate your values and character. Seek help when it becomes too complex and surround yourself with like-minded individuals. You are the people you surround yourself with.

Two great books that help you understand individual and social situations are:

Emotional Intelligence. Why It Can Matter More than IQ by Daniel Goleman.

Social Intelligence. The Revolutionary New Science of Human Relationships, Beyond IQ, Beyond Emotional Intelligence, by Daniel Goleman.

~Missy

Action

Today was a busy, not so busy day of writing. I began working at my desk early this morning with my coffee, intending to write a blog post to start the day. I then got sidetracked editing written works and creating their backgrounds. I have set goals to work on during my winter break between semesters, and time is flying by.

Yep, I made a list of goals to work through—a to-do list to help me use my downtime wisely. I think I forgot to work in some relaxation time, as usual. I am excited that I have managed to compile and publish a lot of work that was once scattered across various places, in notebooks, as text messages, on my computer, and as voice memos. My short and sweet for the day is that action will get you where you need to go. Keep busy like the mighty ant as you work to build your empire. Use your action as momentum to keep growing and moving forward.

What tactics do you use to keep yourself on task?

~ Missy

Januarys March

Are you marching into January with a purpose, treading lightly, or unsure of your next move? No matter which one of those it is, the important thing is to do it with confidence in yourself. One of the best ways I have found to do this is to focus on the moment, be present, smell it, taste it, and feel it. That is your reality.

Journaling can help ground you or figure things out. It is a way to look back on your thoughts and situations from a different perspective. Writing is also a way to expunge the negative, name it, put it to bed, as you turn the page once you have committed it to its place. Another caveat is a deeper understanding of yourself and a grounding in the reality you live in. An opportune moment to self-reflect and assess where change can be beneficial in recognizing an idea, starting a plan, or creating momentum on a project.

Something deep and special happens when you begin to self-reflect, medicine for the soul. The something becomes tangible, and no one can take it away from you. So, however you started your walk into 2026, ground yourself, reflect, and focus on gratitude.

If you journal, what is your favorite method: handwritten, electronic, or voice dictation? That is the short and sweet of it!

~ Missy

Happy New Year’s!

Happy New Year!

I hope everyone had a fabulous New Year's and is embarking on a hopeful new year. I have been away from the computer for a few days! One of the best ways to begin the new year is to focus on what makes you happy. One of the quickest routes to happiness is living a life directed to pursuing your passion relentlessly.

The previous year for me focused on getting closer to achieving my educational goals and expanding on personal growth. Knowledge - knowing yourself is the key to freedom, peace, and tranquility, and the best gift you will ever give yourself. How does this benefit you? Learning your strengths, weaknesses, and dark shadows (triggers) enables you to control yourself and not be manipulated, controlled, or, worst of all, baited by others with ill intent.

As the new year begins and I wrap up a year of daily Stoic reflection and journaling, my goal is to work through the set again each day and read my journaling and writing for insights. Is there something in my writing that I can use and expand on? Did I learn and practice the philosophy? Did I miss something in the hustle and bustle of my busy life with academics, student, and my personal life? True growth is a never ending process, that is the short and sweet of it!

~ Missy

Change

As the new year rolls in, it often inspires New Year's Eve resolutions and making changes in your life. How do you handle change? Do you delay and hide what is about to happen, put your head in the sand, and pretend it will go away? Or do you charge at it and strive to conquer, becoming the victor? Some changes are happy, some are sad, and others are devastating. Finding a balance in dealing with emotions and change has worked best for me.

For me, I would say I am a 10% delay and a 90% hard charger when it comes to regular everyday changes. The delay is coming up with a plan and dealing with the emotions in the moment. After that, I am hard-charging, doing whatever it takes to get things done.

As feelings and types of change become more intense, it will be necessary to adjust the balance, focus on rational thinking and decisions, and avoid emotional responses.

I have found that working out is a great outlet when stress and anxiety may be looming or suffocating. Going for a walk and lavishing affection on your furry friends is a fabulous way to boost your happy hormones and strengthen your bond. A hot shower is like a warm hug, while deep breaths of ice-cold winter air can open the lungs and clear the mind in the moment. Lastly, do as they do on Jeopardy and phone a friend.

How do you deal with stress and anxiety precipitated by change?

~ Missy

Winding Down of 2025

As the end of this year draws near, it is time to sit back and reflect on the year. Did I reach all the goals I set for myself? Did I learn something new? Did I make good use of my time? Who was I as a person? I am satisfied with my reflection on the past year and mulling what next year will bring.

I sacrificed a lot to complete my Doctoral program quickly, but I am grateful for the journey. The one core mantra for me was: you got this woman, and knowing I never give up. I came across a meme this morning and found some inspiration in it. While I am not really into astrology, I do believe in God, synchronicity, and the Universe. Synchroisty, to me, is a fancy way of saying, you got God’s message.

A great book to tie into this for anyone looking to get unstagnated and clean out their closet is The Artist’s Way. A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity by Julia Cameron. I had ordered the book, thinking it would provide business insights and help me build websites. I was surprised at first. BUT engrossed as I worked through each week. I highly recommend booking for everyone: the artist, scientist, business person, health care professional, or stay-at-home mom. This book has something to offer everyone.

2025 will be closing out the year of the snake—the animal I am most terrified of in this world. In Chinese astrology, the snake symbolized shedding, transformation, mastery, healing, depth, intuition, and consciousness. I read this, and each and every one hit the nail on the head for the year of the snake for me. Am I looking at confirmation bias here, or is God giving me a gentle nudge? I am wearing my rose colored sunglasses this morning, so I am going with the latter.

2026 is the year of the horse. The animal I obsessively dreamed of and envisioned having as a child. Reading any and every horse book I could get my hands on. My positive rose colored glasses this morning are labeling this as another nudge.

So, what does the year of the horse represent then? 2026 is supposed to embody movement, courage, adventure, aligned action, magnetism, aliveness, freedom, and boldness. Well, if that is what God has in store for me, I am delighted. Suppose it is confirmation bias, perfect with me also. I am the girl who ardently pursues her dreams. I will never give up, because my perseverance guides me with an indomitable force, guiding me along my path and purpose. The short and sweet of it today is that inspiration can be found in everything once you get your mind set right.

~ Missy

Joy in the Journey

I touched base on incorporating Stoic philosophy into your life in yesterday's post. So, what is the purpose or benefit of the Stoic teaching? I think this quote from Seneca sums it up perfectly: “All study of philosophy and readings should be for the purpose of living a happy life. . . We should seek precepts to help us, noble, courageous words that can become facts. . . We should learn them in a way that the words become works” Seneca, Moral Letters, 108..35, AD 62-24. I chose not to paraphrase the direct quote because of the power it still holds, almost two thousand years later.

I have the coffee cups with the mottos: “Jesus and Coffee” and “Find joy in the journey.” I have saved and shared memes with friends and family, as well as on social media, but have not gained much growth or reward from that. You can get caught in the rut of a 9-5 job that drains you. We are bombarded by toxic people and family, and relationships that are just as sapping while trying to get through that job, or once you get home. So how do you find your “Joy in the Journey” in today's modern society that overstimulates us with electronics, expects results or responses on demand, and wants more while paying less for the output or product?

For me, it started with reflection and falling into my first Stoicism book about four years ago. I read the Seneca quote above this morning in the box set while working through my morning writing routine. It is through self-reflection that we begin to understand ourselves. What are my quirks, what are my ticks, what are my strengths, and what weaknesses do I need to work on? This is the one time it is acceptable to be all me, me, me, because you are the only thing you can control.

My route may not be for everyone. But for others, it can start with a class, listening to a podcast by an expert on the topic, finding a support group, and seeking a professional who can guide you. Surround yourself with like-minded individuals and material. Sometimes it helps to isolate yourself. The point is that there is no quick fix for everyone, but everyone can do it. Once you have found your sweet spot, you will begin to work towards the short and sweet of it!

Happy Christmas Eve to all! And a wonderful Christmas and New Year as you continue in your journey.

~ Missy

Purpose and Mindset, Never Give UP!

One of the hardest things we can do in this world is to express our own thoughts and opinions freely. We get caught in the chokehold of will they judge me for how I feel? Will the emotion become too overpowering in the moment, and I appear not to have my wits, or worse, lose them?

What is this Blog then? It is me expressing my thoughts, sharing my knowledge, and placing my emotions on the table for the world to see. Yep, it was intimidating making that first post. But if I have learned anything at this point in life, it is that it is essential to be true and honest to yourself. You are not who others tell you to be. You are not who the gossip monger or mob of mean girls or guys say you are. Recognizing that they fear your strength, power, and purpose is a direct reflection of why they are acting the way they are. Understanding that they have their own struggles and mental issues can drive their actions. People can knee-jerk project, rather than reflect on what that feeling was.

What I can tell you is that we, each and every person born on this planet, have a purpose. The quickest way to find your purpose is to evaluate your experiences and knowledge. What wisdom have you accumulated in your time here on this planet? What is your passion? Write these out as you work through them and make mental notes when they pop up in your mind. Read the book that may steer you in the right direction and talk with like-minded people. The people you are around make a difference. You want the group that encourages you, sees the good in what you do, and helps you achieve your goals.

A growth mindset directly impacts how you see yourself, your purpose, and how you achieve your goals, especially in the face of challenges or failures. Do you get up, dust off your backside after adversity, or stay down? That’s the short and sweet of it.

So, how do you start to make a change? Read a book, take a class, listen to a podcast, or watch a TED talk. The best one I can recommend first is Start with Why by Simon Sinek. An excellent read that is also highly motivational. Part of my master’s program work, perfect timing for me then.

The next is Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol S. Dweck, PH.D. An enlightening book on how you handle challenges and adversity, and ways to work on changing how you do this if you struggle. Both can also be found on Audible, and the authors have given TED talks. The TED talk with Dweck was posted in one of my doctoral courses, and she referenced her book. I found it and added it to my reading list between semesters—an excellent read for anyone with kids, an educator, or someone who wants to work on their mindset.

Finding your purpose and mindset are large topics that work integrally together. Feel free to message if you are not sure where to start. Hint: Always start by never giving up. That is the short and sweet of it!

~ Missy

Time

Four years ago, I bought my first book on Stoicism. The beginner's guide to Stoicism: how self-discipline and the mastery of emotions and desires can allow you to be successful in life, by Alex Seneca. It was an excellent read that aligned well with some skills I could work on in my master's program. There were quite a few concepts and theories that aligned with my personal values and beliefs. Furthermore, it was insightful, and the philosophy intrigued me. So I went to Amazon and ordered a few books from the recommended reading list.

Mediations by Marcus Aurelius was another favorite of mine. I tend to juggle reading new books between semesters. In the last two years, I have completed 51 of 57 credit hours in my doctoral program. Between coursework and keeping up with students, most days were packed full with little time to do anything else. Yes, it was wildly overwhelming, but I did accomplish the goals I had set for myself.

My subsequent stoic read came from an acquaintance who shared it at the start of 2025. I hurried up and ordered it on Amazon.  It was Ryan Holiday's The Daily Stoic and  The Daily Stoic Journal. You work through the set each day with a reading from different Stoics, a morning journal, and an evening journal entry.

It has been an enlightening process, and I highly encourage everyone to start it at the top of the year, but you can start anytime. I am wrapping up the year, and the focus is time and the inevitable end we all face. So for my age, I have been here 18,980 days and 455,520 hours-ish. You can reverse engineer that if you want to know my age, 😊

I highly recommend journaling; it has been a part of my routine for many years now. Adding something that helps you reflect and grow is a whole other layer of self-reflection and growth—also a fabulous way to detox and reduce stress.

What do you do with your time or spare time? What can you add to your routine to help you grow in time?

~ Missy

A Christmas Carol

As Christmas gets closer each day, so do the Christmas movies that auto-populate in my watchlist. Today, I have definitely gone down the Christmas movie path, enjoying a relaxing Saturday. I find all the classic films and their nostalgia wonderful. I adore their new versions, which appear every few years.  

In kindergarten, I went to the Cleveland Playhouse with my class on a field trip, and we watched the play A Christmas Carol. I had a dollar burning a hole in my pocket and had to choose between popcorn and cotton candy. I would pick the popcorn and remember the feel of the old square box in my hand, and the salt that sprinkled out of the corners onto my lap as I watched the larger than life characters on stage.

All movies or shows that spin off from A Christmas Carol will always be favorites for me to watch. They are fantastic background entertainment while wrapping presents and writing. Here are a few:

Scrooged (1988), The Muppets Christmas Carol (1992), Ghosts of Girlfriend Past (2009), Christmas Carol (2009), and Spirited (2022). Ghosts this week on Paramount did a super cute spin-off, too. One thing I love about Roku TV and all the apps is that you can easily find what your little heart desires, no more Red Box or Blockbuster trips.

Do you prefer Christmas movies or songs while wrapping presents?

~ Missy

Short & Sweet

Today is a short and sweet kind of day for writing. Getting ready for the holiday season can be hectic. However, doing the fun things makes it all the more enjoyable. Fun things on my list are shopping, wrapping presents, and making cookies. The last few days have been busy with the fun stuff and some working out on the side to burn off the extra calories from all the holiday goodies. I do find all the holiday goodies irresistible. Baking is on my list of things to do the next few days, chocolate chip cookies & fudge.

What are some fun things on your list of things to do for the holiday season?

~ Missy

Mindset

Each of us has an internal operating system that guides us through each day. Mindset is this system. Mindset is how you view the world, yourself, your internal voice, and the experiences you have each day. The way you handle a difficult situation and grow from it reflects your mindset. What makes up your mind mindset? Each person’s mindset is a compilation of assumptions, attitudes, habits, and beliefs. Mindset has a direct effect on how you perceive and work through challenges or setbacks, as well as on what might be possible in your future.

Different mindsets that enable a person to grow or rebound include growth, abundance, and resilience. Individuals with these types of mindsets see challenges and adversity as opportunities to grow and learn, even when faced with them. These mindsets are forward-looking and enable visualization of success on the next attempt.

Fixed, scarcity, and survival mindsets focus on permanent, limited resources and safety. Individuals with these mindsets struggle and become entangled in the loops and cycles that frame the world and situations. They become stuck and are unable to grow when faced with challenges and adversity. A fantastic thing about mindset is that it can be changed and is not permanent. Mindsets can be refined and intentionally shaped through awareness, self-reflection, and practice.

Do you know what your mindset is? Would you like to change your mindset?

~ Missy

Tuesday I Wish was a Sunday

On days that you wake up too early and cannot fall back asleep, it becomes the never ending day. You look forward to a possible nap, a slow pace to the day, and early bedtime. Today, there was no luxury of time for a nap or a slow paced day in the morning. As I was making the long drive home from an unplanned trip, I was tired and trying not to nod off, and I thought, "I wish today were Sunday so I could just chill for the rest of the day."

Some days go that way. I find the best way to get through them is to push through and know that, soon enough, the chaos will pass. Keep your eye on the prize, focus on the goal, and know you can do whatever you set your mind to.

Today definitely didn't start at the wake up time I prefer; the day's events were unplanned, and I was dog tired. However, I got the reward this afternoon: the best kitten and chihuahua lap cuddles as I took a break. Dinner was excellent and quick, paired with a lovely pinot noir, and I get to set my bedtime tonight, cuddled by my three furry kiddos.

How do you get through a day that goes sideways on you?

~ Missy

Where is Winter?

One thing Montana is known for is its brutal winters, with winds, snow, and sub-zero temperatures. Over the last seven winters I have lived here, I have shoveled snow paths for my elderly chihuahua, potty trained a wild German Shepard puppy, and loved on horses and mules. I have weathered the bitter cold, knee-deep snow, blustery winds, and guessed where the ditch is driving to feed and treat injured horses on the coldest of winter mornings and eves.

To call this weather right now winter would insult the Norse winter God Ullr, patron of winter sports. The first few mild weeks of winter were lovely, but as extended fall draws closer to Christmas, I am beginning to wonder where the snow is. The charm of snow and breathing icicle laden air during the first snowfall has always been a favorite of mine. And baby Dog loves catching snowballs to eat them and make puppy dog snow angels.

Fingers crossed, old man winter shows up for Christmas this year!

Does anyone else miss winter or prefer the temperate weather so far?

~ Missy

Routines

Routines in our daily lives have multiple benefits, including encouraging healthy habits, improving productivity and academic success, improving independence and confidence, enhancing social skills, developing emotional resilience, improving time management, reducing anxiety, managing stress, and creating connectivity.

Yep, that is a long-winded list that could go on even more. Routines can benefit any area in your life where you would like to improve or grow. So, the next question then is, how do routines magically free you up to develop more creativity and growth?

When you implement a new routine, several things happen:

1) You remove decision fatigue

            Increased clarity and consistency, not focusing on what to do next

2) Train your brain to start focus mode faster

            Trained the brain on where to focus to improve concentration

3)Protect your priorities from distractions

            Similar to boundaries, requiring less willpower

4) Turn efforts into habits

Intentional focus turns into habits through repetition, and improvement is seen in practice over

motivation

5) Create measurable progress

            Repeated daily and weekly results are visible, improving skill  and confidence

6) Stabilize focus during stress/fatigue

            Create a structured default path to follow even when stressed or fatigued.

7) Align your actions with long-term goals

            Create a path to join intent with outcome through repetitive focus on goals

A mentor once suggested that, between semesters, I read or learn something new that was not school-related when I was in one of the earliest classes in my master's program. I took up her advice, and four years later, it is a part of my routine.

The first routine to develop out of this was reading a new book between each semester that was neither school-related nor fiction. My reading list has grown exponentially, and I look for new topics and books to order so I can read them between semesters. This routine has led me into multiple themes and genres, and I am constantly on the lookout for a new read. I am now visualizing the office of my dreams because I have run out of room on my bookcase, desk, and shelves.

Another routine that has developed out of this is a daily gratitude journal, personal journaling, a year of daily Stoic journaling, and now morning pages. Each one has built on the other, and now my morning routine has evolved into still writing all of those while my three furry companions are in my lap, or instigating playtime while I write.

What is a routine you have that helps you in life?

~ Missy

Weekends

Some weekends, I look forward to relaxing and taking some downtime after a hectic week. Others become an opportunity to check times off a to-do list. For me, day one of this weekend was a combination of both. I worked steadily this morning into the afternoon to get my “chores” done around that house and to accomplish the things on my list.

Once my weekend self-appointed work was done, it was time for quality time for the littles. Teddy and Afina both require their allotted attention and cuddle time. Sometimes they share pretty well, sometimes not so much. Today, they are ok with sharing my lap or personal space.

I have learned to study, write papers, journal, and squeeze in some leisurely reading with the little heaters sharing my space. They have also managed to attend Zoom meetings incognito on my lap and recognize the sign-off language. Teddy adorably pops his head up to say goodbye and to remind me how well behaved he was, and now he should get a snackie pooh.

I do say that I would be lost without them and am grateful for their companionship and love. They are gentle reminders to take a break from the stress of the daily hustle and bustle. Are your furry companions a distraction when working or a comforting presence?

~ Missy

Journey

The journey to get here has been a long one, traversing multiple phases and layers in this life. Some wonderful and some not so wonderful. Some are self-directed, and others are less so—all a part of the testimony.

Up until I began working on my master’s degree, I had looked at my journey as a set point in time, a horrific event, one to continue from. One thing I now realize is that my journey began with my first breath and will not end until my last, fifty years from now as a centenarian. We know that our last thought and breath is coming, but we obstinately ignore it through most of our lives. I have set my mind to make sure each and every one of my dreams manifests as I dance towards that centenarian finish line.

What got me here through all those good and not so good parts of this journey? My educated and philosophical self will tell you, mindset. The self before I learned what mindset was would say she told herself, “This will pass,” ”It will not go on forever,” “I’d count my breathes to slow my mind or heart,” “When you wake up, tomorrow is a new day,” “I’d listen to music on my headphones,” “It does not matter, they are not important” I just shrugged it off and kept going. Sometimes effortlessly and others again less so.

So, here we go on another tangent in this journey. I can not wait to see the wonders that are about to happen! Do you know you can change your mindset? If you could go anywhere, would you go? If you could be anything, what would you be?

~ Missy